In Response to Questions: Common Q's as to Marriage in Islam

Original Comment:

Hi, I have a few questions about marriage.

1. Is it bad not to get married?
2. Why the h*ll are you supposed to get arranged marriages?
3. Is it haram not to have an arranged marriage?
4. What is with arranged marriages?
5. Why would you want to marry someone you don't frickin know?
6. Why is Islam so sexist that woman can't marry non-muslims but men can? I mean woman can have control. We're not weak like we're depicted as.

I want to marry a non-muslim who is totally okay with me being muslim and if it's haram I plan to not like 'be Muslim' but like just believe everything I believe now like Allah, Muhammad, Ibrahim, and all the other prophets Muslims believe in. And pray to Allah the way I do now (the proper way) but not 'be' a Muslim so I can marry him.

I WANT ANSWERS ASAP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Well, first, Assalamualaikum. In answer to your first question, it is not considered Haram to not marry but it is advisable and recommended for several reasons. One reason is that it is the Sunnah, and another is that it helps to prevent fornication, engaging in haraam relationships. There are many benefits to being married but if you feel you simply cannot get married for one reason or another then that's up to you.
 
 In answer to your 2-5 questions, I will cite the following from http://www.jannah.org/sisters/marr.html:
"There is a halal arranged marriage and a haram one. It is OK to arrange marriages by suggestion and recommendation as long as both parties are agreeable. The other arranged marriage is when parents choose the future spouse and the couple concerned are forced or have no choice in the matter. "
That's it in a nutshell; in Islam it is not allowed to force a man and a woman into marriage. It may be of culture but it is not of Islam.
 
In reply to Question 6:
 Allah(SWT) Decreed that; and for that sole reason you should obey Him. Allah(SWT) is the Wise and All-Knowing, and He Knows the nature of those he created. We must trust that He Knows Best. Of course, it is encouraged to attempt to discern God's Wisdom. For example, the consumption of alcohol and pork. We can relate to widely known scientific facts when explaining why God would command us to avoid the consumption of such. For some of Allah(SWT)'s Decrees His Wisdom is apparent but for others not so much. In this case we must rely on our faith in Allah(SWT).  

Now who depicts you(or women in general) as weak? The media, general perceptions of people? Allah(SWT) definitely did not state that women are weak and inferior to men and therefore they cannot marry Non-Muslim men. In addition, usually the male is the one who sets how the children will be raised. And if the male is a Non-Muslim, how would the child recieve a healthy Islamic upbringing?
 
 Insha' Allah you will put the importance of sustaining your Islam over your desire. In the meantime, you can make Da'wa to him(the Non-Muslim), educating him about Islam and pray to Allah(SWT) that he becomes Muslim. Once again, it is important to put Islam first, the pleasure of Allah(SWT) first.

I hope that I sufficiently answered your questions and would welcome a comment in response.

Recitation and Translation of Surat al-Fatihah and Surat al-Qadr by Sheikh Mishary Rashed Alafasy

Masha' Allah, such a beautiful voice, and even more so, the words. The Qur' an strikes at your heart...



Comments from other viewers of the video:

1. Subhanallah he's crying mashallah wallahi he made me cry
may Allah(swt) be pleased with him and all muslims inshallah amin

2.Very emotional recitation
God may bless the reciter and the sender of this vid.

3. O God , forgive us for the sins we make
Amen #

4.MashaAllah!!! ALLAHAU AKBAR!!!!

5.Shaikh Mishary is the best...he is always reciting as recitation should be and besides Allah taala has given him the softest voice i have ever heard of a Qari...MashaAllah...May Allah be his protector as well as ours.

Subhana' Allah...the Holy Quran...Allah(SWT)'s Words...


Translation of Al-Fatihah (The Opening):


In the name of Allah, the Beneficent, the Merciful

Praise be to Allah, Lord of the Worlds,

The Beneficent, the Merciful.

Owner of the Day of Judgment,

Thee (alone) we worship; Thee (alone) we ask for help.

Guide us on the straight path,

The path of those whom Thou hast favored;

Not (the path) of those who earn Thine anger nor of those who go astray.


Translation of Surat Al-Qadr (The Night of Decree)


1. Verily! We have sent it (this Qur'an) down in the night of Al-Qadr (Decree)

2. And what will make you know what the night of Al-Qadr (Decree) is?

3. The night of Al-Qadr (Decree) is better than a thousand months (i.e. worshipping Allah in that night is better than worshipping Him a thousand months, i.e. 83 years and 4 months).

4. Therein descend the angels and the Ruh [Jibrael (Gabriel)] by Allah's Permission with all Decrees,

5. Peace! (All that night, there is Peace and Goodness from Allah to His believing slaves) until the appearance of dawn.

The translations were taken from http://www.noblequran.com/
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This is a reminder for us all that the Quran is not simply something you keep for display in your home because you're a Muslim and it seems to be a sort of obligation to have your Holy Book there; it is for constant recitation, memorization, and remembrance of Allah(SWT).

The Surah I am currently memorizing is Surat al-Hujurat, and this afternoon I decided to listen to the audio. I listened to it, then I thought, "Perhaps I can listen to another Shiekh with a more...fervent, beautiful voice." So I began searching on the Web, typing phrases like "beautiful recitation of Shiekh". I found a few Sheiqhs, and in some of the videos they were in Makkah, Masjid Al-Haram, reciting. Subhana' Allah. The video showed many of the Muslimoon there, praying, and the reciter's voice was so beautiful, Masha' Allah...it was a blessing to me, I believe, another of Allah(SWT)'s Blessings; it was a reminder. The Qur 'an, and Islam is so important; we never give it enough of our time and devotion. May Allah(SWT) Forgive us. Ameen.
This is among the many reminders Allah(SWT) Blesses us with; that the Qur 'an is more than what most give it credit for. It is Allah(SWT)'s WORDS, his Advice, his Commands. Listening to His Words Provides me with such a feeling I can't experience listening to/doing any other thing. It's special and unique, and I love it. This afternoon Allah(SWT) Reminded me of the importance of the Quran. It's not just something. When we recite the Quran, or listen to it, or read it, it's one of the times that we are closest to Allah(SWT). You read those comments. Subhana' Allah; Eman, and Taqwa just glistens on those words.I wish we were close to Allah(SWT) always.

The Dunya and the Akhira

ASAK

Life is not here for us to take it easy, revelling in the temporary joy succumbing to temptations yields, fulfilling those lower desires. Besides blatantly disobeying God, that is WASTING this Dunya; every moment, every second Allah(SWT) Gives us...think about it. Reflect for a moment. Could Allah(SWT) not just Will us to Die this very moment? It is very within his power to do so; yet he has let us live. Why? So we can while away the time doing Haraam? Gossiping and slandering, lying and cheating, procrastinating in regards to our Salat, and/or neglecting our Ibadah? He, the Merciful, the Just, is Giving us chance after chance to USE this time to our benefit so that we have something to show for ourselves on the Day of Judgement, something Insha' Allah that will Please our Lord and Bless us with his Mercy so that we will gain entrance to Jennat-ul-Firdous.


We must always appraise the state of our Eman, ALWAYS. We must be self-critical; is my faith weakening? Why is it weakening? Am I not taking advantage of my time, not praying Sunnah? Am I missing some Salat?

And then fix yourself.

It isn't always easy; but when you think of the Akhira and the importance of your achieving Jennah, when you think of Allah(SWT), his Power, his Magnificence, when you think of the prospect of Seeing Him in Jennah...it doesn't seem so difficult.

When you observe Taqwa(Love and Fear of Allah(SWT), then...it doesn't seem so difficult.

To be Posted Soon

ASAK

Listed below are the planned dates for the corresponding posts to be published:

May 8, 2010: The Dunya and the Akhira

May 9, 2010  May 22, 2010 May 29, 2010: True Friends are Blessings ("All friends are helpful; they just do it in their own way. For example, some friends help you enter Hell, and some help you get to Jennah."-Excerpt from upcoming post as a compensation for the delays.)